The last time I had fun at the mall I was with my boys. We were looking for back-to-school clothes for them. They were obnoxious on the escalator and we stuffed our faces with fast food. I got a coffee drink at Sbucks and I let them wander around unattended for an hour. So, the mall was fun on that day. And it was fun because I was shopping for them, not for me.
Recently, I felt it was time for a new pair of jeans for myself so I headed to the mall. I went alone this time and I was filled with excitement about purchasing something new that would no doubt look fabulous! But in this age of so many choices it seems there aren’t that many in the way of clothing after all. It looks like the two choices that predominate at the mall are the “stripper” look or the “boxy, old lady” look. Or if you’re lucky you might get the “Phoenix Lady” look with lots of shiny things grommeted to the fabric. Yes, there is Anne Taylor, Banana Republic, Talbots and so forth for the ‘classic’ or ‘heritage’ look. But, when you examine the quality of even these higher end lines it leaves you keeping your wallet closed.
After hours of looking for some jeans that wouldn’t make me look whorish or old, or both, I headed to Cinnabon to drown my sorrows in 880 calories of sugary, delicious fat. As I was standing in line awaiting my cinnamon gooey treasure I thought about how lucky I am to not have to be a slave to the mall and all it lacks. I got out of line at Cinnabon and instead went home to draft up a pair of pants. Here are 7 reasons why sewing is way better than a Cinnabon.
- Sewing will never add 880 calories to your bottom line.
- Sewing stimulates your brain. Eating a Cinnabon could cause you to fall into a sleepy sugar coma.
- Sewing will make you look hot and super confident beyond your dreams. A Cinnabon? See number 1 and 2.
- Sewing makes you laugh. Try keeping a straight face when a sewing buddy tries on her new pants and says “Gee, they fit great!” But they’re actually on backwards. A Cinnabon has never made me laugh.
- Sewing creates Eustress, which is a rush of excitement some call it JOY. What you experience when you eat a Cinnabon is your pancreas crying.
- When has sewing caused any cavities? Sewing 6 Cinnabon 0.
- Sewing, studies have shown* actually grows brain cells, stops chronic worrying, makes you appear taller and stops time. O’ wherefore art thou now, Cinnabon?
*Studies are my own. But, it’s true.
What’s your reason for sewing?
Aw, can’t I sew and have a Cinnabon? Actually, I don’t think I’ve ever had one. I’m more of a Auntie Anne’s Pretzel / pants on forwards kind of gal.
Where’s the fun in wearing you pants on forward!? But, I may need to try old Annie’s pretzel.
I can’t stand it when my pancreas cries. You are brilliant, and funny, and I’m glad you’re blogging again!
Thank you! I’m looking forward to getting my fill of old Hollywood gossip again too.
Hilarious! I absolutely love this, you made me laugh out loud!
Very funny! Sewing wins over Cinnabon every time!